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Rather, I would like to share with you the beauty God intended for the relationship between husband and wife — beginning with Adam and Eve. No wonder it is under attack today. We can do nothing ourselves; God must do it. To speak to Him thus is easier by nature for woman than for man because a natural desire lives in her to give herself completely to someone. We are ending The Nine Faces of Struggle with the first pain you experienced as a human being — separation from your mother.

The one whose body supported you for nine months before your birth, and whose arms held you for much longer. She is likely the one who provided most of the comfort and nurture you received in your childhood.

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However, before you can better understand your relationship with your mother you must look at her relationship with your father. Regardless of which account of creation you read in the Bible you will see that God made mankind both male and female to live a life together and it is from this relationship that the first children were born. While we can certainly never understand the mind of God, we can see that God choose to make mankind in his image in two distinctly different forms — male and female.

One can only assume that within this creation we can find a fullness of love that is the image of divine love itself. In the second chapter of Genesis we are allowed a glimpse into the relationship between the first man and the first woman — our first parents. Adam, the first man, was created from dust and after receiving the breath of life from God he was placed in the garden to till and keep it.

My Marriage is a Gift?!?!

However, God noticed that Adam was alone and in need of a helper and partner. Then, both creator and the one created, began a quest together. A quest in search for the perfect partner and companion for Adam. Side by side God and Adam witnessed the world coming together beautifully as they sought such a creature. One can imagine the delight that God and Adam must have taken in this most sacred and personal relationship in the garden.

As God created every living creature, allowing Adam to name them all, they must have experienced real male bonding! However, none of the creations were a perfect mate for Adam. Adam needed a partner he could love and care for, one who was his complement and equal. God needed to create a very special creation for his beloved son, a creation that must be created differently than all the others. God knew Adam needed a companion drawn from his own bones and flesh, one that he would love as he loves himself.

It was out of love that God created Eve for his son Adam. Therefore a man leaves his father and his mother and clings to his wife, and they become one flesh. Her beauty must have perfectly complemented the rugged Adam born of the dust. Created from his own body, Adam would forever desire to draw his Eve back towards himself so he could care for her.

Marriage Is Not About Me | Desiring God

It was only in that some Protestant denominations began to reject this long-held position. Those opposed to this trend predicted an increase in premarital sex, adultery, acceptance of divorce, and abortion. Later, in , Pope Paul VI warned that the use of contraception would allow one spouse to treat the other more like an object than a person, and that in time governments would be tempted to impose laws limiting family size.

These predictions have come true. Today we see a pandemic of sexually transmitted diseases, an enormous rise in cohabitation, one in three children born outside of marriage, and abortion used by many when contraception fails. Some methods of birth control are aimed at preventing the union of sperm and egg and therefore act only as contraceptives.

Inclusive Statement on the Gift of Marriage

These would include barriers such as condoms and diaphragms. By contrast, hormonal methods such as the Pill may work in several ways. They can suppress ovulation or alter cervical mucus to prevent fertilization, and thus act contraceptively. But they may at times have other effects, such as changes to the lining of the uterus. If the contraceptive action fails and fertilization takes place, these hormonal methods may make it impossible for a newly conceived life to implant and survive. That would be a very early abortion. Medical opinions differ on whether or how often this may occur.

Currently there is no way to know precisely how these drugs work at any given time in an individual woman. In some cases these pills are taken when sperm and egg have already joined to create a new life, in which case the drug could not have any effect except to cause an early abortion. By using contraception, couples may think that they are avoiding problems or easing tensions, that they are exerting control over their lives. But the gift of being able to help create another person, a new human being with his or her own life, involves profound relationships.

It affects our relationship with God, who created us complete with this powerful gift. It involves whether spouses will truly love and accept each other as they are, including their gift of fertility. Finally, it involves the way spouses will spontaneously accept their child as a gift from God and the fruit of their mutual love.

Like all important relationships with other persons, it is not subject solely to our individual control. In the end, this gift is far richer and more rewarding than that. You are not your own; you were bought with a price. So glorify God in your body. But husbands and wives have not been left alone to live out this fundamental life challenge. If you have failed to do so in the past, do not be discouraged. God loves you and wants your ultimate happiness.

Loving as Christ loves is a possibility opened to us by the power of the Holy Spirit, as a free gift of God. Through prayer and the sacraments, including Reconciliation and the Eucharist, God offers us the strength to live up to this challenge. The following list of resources begins with practical assistance and brief articles, and it concludes with books and major Church documents that explore the Church's vision of responsible parenthood at a deeper level. It was approved for publication by the full body of bishops at its November General Meeting and has been authorized for publication by the undersigned.

Daily Marriage Tip

David J. All rights reserved.

Used by permission. Published by Servant Books, an imprint of St. Anthony Messenger Press.

Viewing marriage realistically

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Getting married. What a blessed and hope-filled time. What does the Church teach about married love? What does this have to do with contraception?

Why does saying "yes" to children at the altar mean never using contraception to close the act of intercourse to new life? Read Genesis So it has certain advantages and the potential for bringing blessings. For instance, a good marriage is the best foundation for family life. Children need a stable environment with parents to raise them, providing love, discipline, and guidance. Psalm ; Ephesians However, child-rearing is not the only reason for marriage. For if one of them falls, the other can help his partner up.


  • Inclusive Statement on the Gift of Marriage - Covenant Network;
  • Children: the Supreme Gift of Marriage!
  • The Gift of Marriage | Issue Article | The Word Among Us.
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But what will happen to the one who falls with no one to help him up? Moreover, if two lie down together, they will stay warm, but how can just one keep warm?


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  7. And someone may overpower one alone, but two together can take a stand against him. And a threefold cord cannot quickly be torn apart. Marriage, of course, involves the closest of friendships. As this scripture shows, such a union can provide assistance, comfort, and protection.